View Episode 226
Originally aired 07.13.10
1:03:15
1:00:07 – UYD: Current and inclusive
16:47 – Somberly, Seth says “Tuesday, July 13… After 102 episodes, we’re all going to gather together and we’re going to say goodbye. We’re going to say goodby to The Hills.” The series finale is called “Truth and Time Tell All.” It all started on May 31, 2006 and it’s ending now. Seth has had a relationship with these people and gotten to know them. In memorium, Seth reads some lyrics from the show’s theme song, “Unwritten,” by Natasha Bedingfield: “Drench yourself in words unspoken / Live your life with arms wide open / Today is where your book begins / The rest is still unwritten.”
18:57 – Honestly, Jah says that there’s no denying the impact The Hills has had on the TV universe. It almost changed an entire city because it became like another atmosphere that was pervasive throughout the city. Seth says the show taught him to dream. Jah then says he’s worried for all the cast members of the show.
50:28 – Three weeks from now, Sunday, Aug. 1, everyone get your Shark Week (Episode 023, 10:55; Episode 075, 43:33; Episode 125, 8:47; Episode 176, 19:43).
9:17 – Jah drank a Four Loko this weekend (Episode 225, 4:20)
58:09 – Jah says he wants to go to a religion where the women are really hot. Seth informs him that that religion is Scientology and then Jah backtracks.
51:19 – Prince: “The internet’s completely over.”
2:13 – Seth reads an article about “Hippie Crack: Inside the Nitris Mafia.” It’s an east coast hippie crack ring. Their ballooning business comes to a music fest near you. During the summer concert season, two rings – one based in Boston and one in Philly – sell balloons at $5 a pop. If you can get 350 balloons in a tank, these guys can make $300,000 in a weekend festival. In the article they showed people holding up signs that said I NEED GAS. Festivals like “All Good” in the mountains of West Virginia have a section called “Wookie Nitris Cove” and “Gathering of the Vibes” in Connecticut has “Nitris Alley.” Nitris is regulated by the FDA. The ring has kitchen supply stores that they buy hundreds of tanks from with phoney restaurant licenses. A lot of the guys are ex-cons and dirtbags. The Wrecking Crew are true Deadheads down on Shakedown Street. Cops and EMTs say the main problem is finding teeth and everyone is dropping after huffing it.
5:22 – Jah said that doing nitris around asphalt is dangerous, however, he retells a fun hippie nitris game he used to play (Episode 093, 40:34). Two guys or girls participate in a type of horse-sack race in a grassy area. They take a nitris balloon and take turns huffing it in and out and then try to run as fast as they can in a straight line. Seth says it’s kind of like a dizzy bat race.
4:33 – Jah huffed nitris in a house that Charles Manson used to live in when he was 16 years old and he split his head open after passing out and hitting his head on a boulder. The house was off of Sunset
6:07 – When Seth was at the Reggae Fest in Vermont, his friend Todd Trefree fell into a campfire after sitting around and huffing nitris. He was a big dude and took a full header into it. Jah admits that nitris is super dangerous and all it does is cut oxygen off to the brain and kill brain cells. He then says it’s like “gassy watermelon.”
8:50 – Seth calls out Jah for ordering a pay-per-view UFC fight. Jah admits he watched Brock Lesnar get his face mashed up by Shane Carwin before eventually winning. And Jah watched Fedor lose his fight the week before. And Jah watches UFC now because his life is “a fuckin’ joke.” He has no TV, no internet and somehow has still seen every major lineup in the last six months.
9:17 – Jah drank a Four Loko this weekend – two maybe (Episode 225, 4:20). In the last three nights he told Seth he drank 5 beers to fall asleep.
9:59 – Jah’s typical experience in a rental car business is that nothing gets done. Their offices are set up for 60 people and there are 2 ½ people working there. One of them is full ensconced in a major debacle somewhere. So there’s only one person available to you and the half-person is worthless.
11:17 – Seth is scared because he’s going to be driving a rental car this weekend. The Plymouth Sundance he owns was rigorously inspected by several different top-notch internationally-renowned technicians before he purchased it to allow for optimum safety. Now he is throwing caution to the wind and getting into a car that he does not know the specs on. Jah says the mistake in putting your life in the hands of the person who is behind that counter. Seth explains the reason he’s renting the car is because he and Jonathan are going up north this weekend for a wedding of their friends Leah and Eric. They will be involved intimately in that ceremony. Seth said they’re going up to the Emerald Triangle “to see where it all starts.”
39:05 – Seth saw a hipster walking around with Real-D glasses where he took the lenses out and was walking with just the frames. Jah thinks even a hipster would be offended by that being associated with a hipster. Jah says this is something you do when you first start smoking weed in eighth grade. Seth says it might be acceptable if you were a kid on a field trip to see Hubble and you’re the only smartest kid to slip the glasses into your pocket. This was a 30-year-old Japanese dude. Jah then gives him a pass because Asians can kick crazy flavor for some reason and then get away with murder. But Seth says this guy’s full rigout was not doing it – flip flops with the tightest denim cut-off shorts. Jah can only imagine how short the short shorts are in New York City right now when it’s 108 degrees.
44:31 – Jah admits he saw Up though and it made him cry. He would take a kid to see that movie. Seth thinks Jah is referring to the Up Series documentaries that follow lives of 14 British children since they were 7 years old in 1964.
55:04 – Jah remembers the ordinance passing through Mayor Tom Bradley disallowing Krishnas from panhandling at LAX. They used to come out so deep and showed up in movies about LAX. Seth doesn’t know anyone who has become a Hare Krishna, but Jah remembers his mom used to take him to the Krishna Temple when he was a kid to eat because the food was mad good.
9:32 – Alamo, Avis, Budget, Dollar, Enterprise, Hertz and Thrifty – all rental car companies. There was an ABC News investigative report that says that these companies routinely rent out vehicles that have been recalled by the manufacturer. The carmaker will send the notice to the rental office because the paperwork will show they purchased the vehicle for their fleet. There are too many cars to pull so they continue to rent them out because it’s too crazy. Seth says the story comes from a tragic story where a family had two daughters who were killed in a car wreck because things explode in the car and fill it up with black smoke and they drove it off the road. In the deposition, the manager of the store wearing a suit from Men’s Wearhouse just sits there like a douchebag with no answers.
21:05 – American theoretical physicist Michio Kaku, a specialist in string theory and futurist author, most recently of the book “Physics of the Impossible: A Scientific Exploration Into the World of Phasers, Forcefields, Teleportation and Time Travel,” was on The Colbert Report last week and told us that within two decades we will have fully operational invisibility cloaks.
24:18 – Ten years ago, the brand-new Chrysler PT Cruiser was the hottest car out of Detroit. So many were sold that people were put on waiting lists for them. But with just over 5,000 sold this year, the last one will be built in the next few days. Jah goes on record to say that if he were a rich man, he would buy the very last PT Cruiser ever made. Seth thinks Kid Rock had the very first one; Jah thinks his old housekeeper had the first one.
26:44 – Seth tells Jah he is holding an official court document in his hand from April 14, 1997 from Los Angeles Superior Court. It’s a case between Pietra Dawn Thornton, the plaintiff, and Billy Bob Thornton, the defendant. It’s a 25-page restraining order that Pietra took against Billy Bob. Approximately Dec. 1992, respondent went to a psychiatrist in West Hollywood, who diagnosed him as a manic depressive and prescribed lithium for him, which he was taking on a daily basis. Based on his promise to stay on the meds and continue treatment, Pietra moved back in with him. They agreed that if respondent “felt an episode coming,” he would leave their apartment in the Palisades and stay in their West Hollywood apartment until he was under control. They were married in February 1993. Approximately two months after they were married, Billy Bob told her he couldn’t take lithium anymore because it blocked his creativity and made him feel “like a piece of driftwood.” He promised if he ever lost control he would seek help. It’s then 15 pages of him going apeshit-wild on her. There was one particular incident when they spent the Christmas holidays in 1994 with his mother in native Arkansas: “In front of his mother and our children, respondent shoved me. He then left the room. His mother said, ‘What did you do to make him do that?’”
36:41 – 57-year-old Dane Eisenman of Connecticut responded to a classified advertisement for a high-powered rifle for sale. While filling out the paperwork he mentioned to the seller that he would be using the weapon to kill aliens. The seller was unsure if he meant space aliens or illegal aliens. Eisemnan said that every 36,000 years, aliens who live underneath the sun come to earth to kill humans and that he needed to be prepared because they’re going to be coming soon. The seller called local police, who arrested Eisenman because he is a convicted felon and legally cannot own a firearm.
37:54 – Jean-Paul Gaultier, a designer, had a show at French Fashion Week that was eye-popping. Invites to the show were printed on pairs of disposable 3D glasses, which the attendants of the show then put on their faces to see his new line of billowy silk ponchos covered in crescent moons, falling stars and orbiting planets, all jumping off the shirt in 3D patterns.
40:35 – Universal Studios has a new attraction called King Kong 3-D. Jah doesn’t want to hear about it: “Now I can cry in 3-D and still be mad.” (Episode 118, 17:04). It’s a 45-minute tram tour but this is only 3 minutes of the 45-minute tour. The cheapest tour is $59 and parking is $15. If you go to Universal, they also have these amazing attractions that are open to the public: The Revenge of the Mummy: The Ride, Jurassic Park: The Ride, Terminator 2: 3-D, The Simpsons Ride, Shrek 4-D, Universal Animal Acts, Waterworld, The Blues Brothers, Adventures of Curious George. Jah says it would be so cruel to deprive your children of the things you used to do as a child (like Universal Studios), but he doesn’t think as a man that he could bring himself to do it.
45:57 – 31-year-old 4-foot-11-inch Patricia Dye was arrested in Ohio posing as a 14-year-old boy named Matt Abrams in order to have sexual relations with a local 16-year-old girl. The two had spent three days in a hotel room together before the 16-year-old girl discovered that Abrams was an adult woman.
48:46 – The United States Post Office, which is $27 trillion in debt, wants to raise postal rates in January of 2011. The price of stamps for first-class mail will go from 44 cents to 46 cents and postcards will go from 28 cents to 30 cents (Episode 012, 51:41, Episode 013, 41:56 and Episode 157, 8:06).
54:49 – Almost 13 years after it was passed, a municipal ordinance can be enforced that bans the International Society for Krishna Consciousness from panhandling at the Los Angeles International Airport.
58:33 – Archie Comics is getting its first gay character. The long-running comic said that an issue coming out in September will introduce its first openly gay character, Kevin Keller, to the student body at Riverdale High School. (Seth includes a side note to say that Riverdale is based on the high school Seth went to, Haverhill High School in Haverhill, Mass. Bob Montana, the creator of Archie Comics, was a Haverhill grad.) The strapping blonde will defeat Jughead in a burger-eating contest, win the affection of Veronica and wrestle over how to gently rebuff her flirtations. The title of the episode will be called “Isn’t It Bromantic?” Kevin just wants to chill with Jughead. They introduced Kevin to keep Archie Comics current and inclusive.
1:28 – Seth reveals that Jah’s birthday (Aug. 7) falls on a Saturday next month and asks him if he’s ready to party. Jah says no, he isn’t.
1:54 – Before Seth dives into a news tidbit, Jah takes a second to slow it down and say it’s nice to be there doing the show.
15:39 – Jah recommends that Seth gets a huge chopper trike with double wheels in the back. He remembers seeing one of these driven by Peter Dinklage in a movie he starred in with Gary Oldman where both play little people. For the life of him Jah can’t think of the name of this movie. Seth thinks Gary Oldman is really tiny but J-dawg looks it up to double-check: he’s 5-foot-9. Seth still thinks he has an English bone disease that keeps him smaller and he’s just posing as 5-9.
29:40 – Jah says that women can make men crazy, but says he’s not defending Billy Bob Thornton. He thinks men have the ability to really hurt women emotionally, but he believes they do have the upper hand in how psychologically painful they can be to us.
30:48 – Jah loved Sling Blade and he thinks Billy Bob Thornton wanted to make some real movies. He thought J.T. Walsh was awesome in the movie too. He also loved Lucas Black in the movie and loved seeing him again in Friday Night Lights, where there was a similar Billy Bob/Lucas/country star connection to Sling Blade. (Episode 079, 58:50).
32:20 – Jah says he simply can’t shake the name of the stupid movie with Peter Dinklage and Gary Oldman. While he reads the next segment he wants Seth to look it up online.
34:00 – Seth has finally found it. Tiptoes is a 2003 film starring Kate Beckinsale, Matthew McConaughey and Gary Oldman. Kate Beckinsale is a talented painter and independent woman who falls in love with Steven (played by McConaughey) without knowing much about him other than he is the perfect man. But when she finds herself pregnant it forces McConaughey to expose his darkest secret – his family. Steven happens to be the only average-sized person in a family of dwarves, including his twin brother, Rolfe (played by Gary Oldman). Carol and Steven are then forced to come to terms with the fact that the fetus she carries may be born a dwarf. This terrifies McConaughey, as he had to watch his twin brother suffer the difficulties of being a little person and does not want to watch this child suffer that same pain. As Carol decides to carry the child, she and Steven grow farther apart and she begins to rely on Rolfe to teach her about life with people with dwarfism. Peter Dinklage appears as Maurice. Patricia Arquette is Lucy, David Alan Grier is Jerry Robin Jr.
38:52 – Jah wonders why no one has sent them any awesome sturdy pairs of 3D glasses
48:08 – Jah goes online to discover Tim Roth’s alleged height – 5-foot, 7 inches. He reads some comments about it: “This guy always nods his head to the side all the time.” … “He’s not 5-7.” … “He looks tiny, I doubt he’s 5-7.” … “He pretty consistenly looks exactly 5-7 in Lie To Me. In his Tarantino movies he was around taller actors so he may have looked 5-6.” … “He’s a solid 5-7 and as for him being a dick, everyone has their bad days, and he’s also known for being a little cool toward male fans. But from female fans who have met him, I’ve heard he treats them like gold.”
49:40 – Seth and Jah can’t think of the movie that Roth and Tupac Shakur were in together. They know it’s a one-word title. Jah finally looks it up, Gridlock’d.
1:00:14 – Jah thanks all UYD listeners and says it means the world to him that people listen and tell friends about the show.
1:03:02 – After weeks of telling people to breathe, smile, drink water, sleep, etc., Seth and Jah are simply telling people to “Have the best week.”
7:00 – A study in the proceedings in the National Academy of Sciences reports a group of scientists who took several mice and set up a fight club-style tournament of UFC-style cagefighting. They found clear evidence of “the winner effect” in which a mouse that has just won a fight maintains elevated levels of testosterone and aggression and is therefore more likely to win his next bout. The winner effect was strongest in mice that were fighting in their own cages, thus the home-field advantage.
32:29 – David Freeman wrote a book called “Wrong: Why Experts Keep Failing Us and How to Know When Not To Trust Them.” He claims that as much as 90% of a physician’s medical knowledge has been found to be substantially or completely wrong. Jah says that this sounds about right.
8:26 – Jah goes off on the stupid scientists who are using mice as cage fighters and talking about “winner effect.”
56:47 – Jah says the saying is “Never trust a religion where their number one requirement for membership is to renounce all your worldly possessions.”