View Episode 179
Originally aired 08.17.09
1:09:24
19:22 – UYDo: Negros and Negrons
19:31 – Seth wonders why every single guest on The Jimmy Fallon Show makes a point of giving props to his house band, The Roots.
21:08 – Seth plugs Mad Men, this Sunday on AMC.
47:19 – Seth was watching Dating In The Dark, and some of the dudes get left out on the balcony watching the girl walk out the front door with her suitcase, and Seth is waiting for the episode when a dude goes off on the girl and yells at her from the balcony.
56:31 – Seth was watching Criss Angel: Mindfreak. Angel took a ring from a woman, took out his crazy jeans with patches and rips, pushes the ring onto the jeans and it disappears. He takes a knife out and cuts the patch on the jeans to prove he’s not hiding it under the patch. He takes a box cutter, cuts his thigh open, digs his fingers into his leg and pulls out the ring from under his skin. He also really likes to eat the camera.
1:06:22 – Seth plugs America’s Best Dance Crew Season 4. His favorite so far is Vogue Evolution.
1:07:54 – Seth watched Chain Gang Girls 2 on Women’s Television. It wasn’t as sexy as he had remembered it.
50:29 – A woman posted a Craig’s List ad in Florida offering childcare to any local families. She got a call from a man asking if she had any experience with special-needs care. The situation seemed as though his brother had been in a bad car accident which had left him with physical handicaps as well as some mental stuff that gave him the mind of a child. He would need to be taken care of as a kid. She agreed because they offered $600 a week and she spent 3 months caring for the man hand and foot. She bottle fed him, she changed and cleaned the diaper he wore, she patted his head while he napped, etc. She grew suspicious of the “brother” she had met because they had never met face-to-face, only talked over the phone. The man-boy always showed up to her house by himself, and apparently his aunt lived around the corner so he could walk on his own. One day after the man left, the woman sent her husband to follow him. He hobbled out of the house, walked around the corner, hopped into a car and drove down the street. The husband chased him down and got him to cop to the fact that he was faking it and he was “the brother.”
50:29 – A combination Craig's List / This Week In Florida segment.
22:24 – Paul Reubens will be doing a new stage show of Pee-Wee Herman in November in Hollywood. Reubens expressed some reservations: “I have some fear that he won’t be funny after all this time.”
2:45 – Seth wonders if Faces of Meth could get some new faces, because they had some great faces when they started off, but now Seth is still seeing the same faces of meth addicts
33:27 – Seth talks about how there’s 800 marijuana dispensaries in L.A., and 17 up the street from his house within a 3-block radius
1:02:17 – Jah thinks sleep-eating is possible if you’re on Ambien, but otherwise it’s bullshit.
5:24 – Seth’s mom got him some Soft Scrub detergent with bleach and it works. She did a little test run on the table in his apartment to show Seth the potency, and made a little design, and there’s still an “S” on the table.
6:52 – Seth never did summer school, but Jah did it every summer of high school including the year after his graduating year. Seth isn’t surprised by this, because on Tuesdays at 10:00 a.m. while people were in History class, Jah was getting Filet-o-Fishes, smoking weed and screaming about JAH! while driving down the PCH.
9:25 – Seth’s old man was in Boston last week at a hotel, and said there were skateboarder dudes all over the hotel. There was some big skateboarding event at the Boston Garden. He was down at the bar and walked up to a table of dudes and wondered if he could get passes to the show. He then asked them, “Are any of you guys the 2 Girls 1 Cup dude?” The whole table of skaters lost it and erupted in laughter.
19:03 – Seth met Taylor Negron, the actor who delivers a pizza in Fast Times at Ridgemont High, a couple weeks ago. He is Chuck Negron’s brother.
23:16 – Jah declares that Pee-Wee’s Playhouse was the dopest children’s TV show ever. He says that he drove by the dinosaur that was featured in a kissing scene in Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure on the way back from The Integratron yesterday.
30:06 – Every P.E. teacher Jah had was either a crazy dyke or had a mustache and a cocaine problem. He had a couple macho P.E. dudes who drove Trans-Ams and wore dolphin shorts. Seth’s gym teacher was the oldest dude in the world, and the kids would play basketball and want to be Michael Jordan. He would give them lectures about how MJ was too flashy and would never make it, Larry Bird had the fundamentals and there was no defense against the skyhook.
31:32 – When Seth is in Larchmont and he sees kids on skateboards, he’ll give them a nod and they just think he’s a whack old dude. But he says he had a good run when Jonathan gave Seth some Nike SBs a year ago on his birthday. Right when he got them he had a couple months when they were legitimate and he was Danny Way. He would see kids and just stretch down in front of them and flash the SBs.
3:48 – In Spokane, Wash., they have a complete and total ban on sales of dishwashing detergent that contain phosphates which run into the Spokane River and kill fish by depleting oxygen in the water. Residents are forced to drive 45 minutes across state lines to Couer d’Alene, Idaho, and smuggle over what they call “the good stuff” – non-green brand name products.
6:14 – All over California, classrooms have taken a severe hit because of the economic crisis. Because of this, the State Board of Education says that the schools will not be receiving any new textbooks until 2016 at the earliest. Students’ books will not have any references to President Obama, the mortgage crisis, the financial meltdown or climate change for at least six more years.
10:38 – With more people out of work, two professions are seeing a dramatic rise – DJs and stand-up comedians. Seth wants people to realize that DJing is not a real thing. Jah has pursued both of these professions, and can’t believe he pursued the two worst professions in the world.
13:33 – Mr. Skin, a website dedicated to every single nude scene in mainstream film/cinema. He has released his top 100 nude scenes of all time. Jah wonders if there was ever a situation in which Seth would beat off to a starlet, and he says never in a million years. The top five are: 5) Marisa Tomei in Before The Devil Knows You’re Dead; 4) Jessica Biel in Powder Blue; 3) Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct; 2) Angelina Jolie in Gia; and 1) Phoebe Cates in Fast Times at Ridgemont High. After saying this one Jah thinks he might have beat off to that one.
26:01 – The Obsessive Compulsive Disorder Foundation (OCDF) held their annual conference last weekend in Minneapolis, featuring seminars and speakers.
43:01 – DayWannaCumAlot is Jonathan’s Native American name
48:22 – Brinks Home Security is now Broadview, and they have a shitty new commercial on to introduce it, showing a guy sitting in his Chevy Cobalt and then going apeshit, kicking down a door, etc.
54:46 – Jah reads an ad about Southern California’s Premiere 3D/4D Fetal Ultrasound Experience. The slogan is “Here’s Looking at You, Baby.” If you bring the ad in when you get your ultrasound, you get a free tote bag with your ultrasound image on it.
1:04:32 – Seth wonders why people put emphasis on the wrong syllable when they say things: “I was watching the TV,” “I went to eat at Taco Bell,” etc. (Episode 016, 34:13).
1:05:36 – Seth once again plugs the live UYD show at Public Assembly in Brooklyn, N.Y. on Oct. 17.
1:06:06 – Jah promises new t-shirts coming through and some new designs as well.
27:51 – The National Children’s Hospital in Columbus, Ohio, has published a study in the September issue of Pediatrics highlighting the huge increase of injuries suffered by American schoolchildren in the nation’s gym/P.E. (Episode 002, 29:02; Episode 008, 37:00; Episode 041, 43:24; Episode 082, 10:54) classes. In the last 10 years, we have seen a 150% increase, with up to 62,000 kids being injured each year. They believe the cause is a lack of adult supervision, larger class sizes, decline in school nurses and lack of physical education teachers. U.S. hospitals report seeing deep cuts, bruises, broken bones and heat stroke. Jah’s theory is that all of these kids are wicked out of shape and can’t do anything physical without breaking or injuring something.
39:47 – According to results of a study published in the Journal of Human Nature, men are not as picky as women when it comes to choosing a partner for a one-night stand. 900 college students were asked to judge pics of the opposite sex as slightly unattractive, moderately attractive and definitely attractive – then were asked to rate the chances of going out on a date, going to the person’s apartment and going to bed with them on a scale of 0-100 – 0 being Definitely Not or 100 being Definitely Yes. Regardless of the person’s looks, men were way more likely to accept all three. As for sex, 4% of women said yes while 50% of the men did. … Jah explains that men can flip the “boner switch” much easier than women can.
1:38 – Jah wants to know what’s up with shitty hip-hop and pop radio stations playing the worst jams ever
8:18 – Jah says our country’s game right now is so whack. It’s hemorraghing, and we should be focusing everything into our educational system, but instead we’re withholding information from the kids until we’re so far into the mix that they can’t be helped either.
22:54 – Seth rips Paul Reubens for trying to revamp Pee-Wee Herman
32:05 – Seth hammers Cheech Marin for getting married and then yelling to Tommy Chong, who faux smokes a joint. Cheech then is asked what Chong got him for his wedding present, and Cheech says “I smoked it already.” The weed today would kill Cheech and Chong if they tried it. Seth says he’s going to get the best weed in L.A., roll it up, go to Madeo and slip Tommy Chong a J so he dies that night.
36:16 – Seth again blasts Pee-Wee Herman for expecting him to buy a $38 ticket and drive and get a $55 parking ticket so he can sit in a hot cramped theater and watch a 55-year-old pedophile dress up like a little boy and play a character he did in a movie when Seth was 11 years old.