View Episode 080
Originally aired 09.01.07
1:04:19
1:38 – UYD: Naturally sexy
17:48 – Jah references ongoing run of UYD slogans. His fave? What starts with techno, involves two guys and offends a lot of people? Gay sex or UYD. (18:10)
43:26 – UYD: Life can only end in a draw
43:04 – Tuesday night, 10 p.m., CMT, 1 hour, Seth’s favorite show is back – the Season 2 premiere of Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders; Thursday night, Saints vs. Colts, Giants vs. Cowboys on Sunday; Hank Williams will be back for the 19th year of Monday Night Football.
13:27 – Seth detours into Rants & Raves. Examples: Who’s crying now, Jap slant. USA 3, Japan 2. Walk-off HR. (reference to USA Little League team beating Japan). Regarding Mexican babies – Fuck ‘em. (15:07)
1:01:41 – Repeat: Regarding Mexican babies – Fuck ‘em.
50:29 – Nelly – “Hot In Herre”
53:08 – Kenny Chesney – “The Good Stuff”
7:38 - Boyscout Files
28:37 - Ashes to Jupiter
Games That Jonathan and Seth Play
26:14 – 7 Real/fake jam band names: Jah gets 4 out of 7 correct
59:11 – Seth wants to know what happened to drugs, but Jah assures him that people still do drugs and Zorb at the same time
47:40 – Nov. 3, 1981 – “Today I brought my Dallas Cowboys football pencils…” Jan. 28, 1982 – “The Dallas Cowboys are my favorite team. I soaked my pants in the snow playing football.” Jan. 12, 1982 – “I have to get a tooth pulled today. I’m going to ask if I can keep it and put it under my pillow and get about 50 cents from the Tooth Fairy.” Jan. 13 – “I put it under my pillow and I got half a dollar.”
31:10 – When Seth saw Miss Teen USA last Friday night and heard Miss South Carolina’s answer, it was one of the purest expressions of joy Seth has ever had in his life. He thought they were going to drop it on UYD and have it take them straight to the top, but like 2 hours later it was on YouTube
35:12 – Jah’s story about the ridiculously hot woman who practically strips right in front of him at the pet store
1:03:49 – Seth revisits the pet store story: “Hot women feel free to show you their vages in public and not think twice about it because it’s like their sister at home.”
31:50 – Miss NC at Miss Teen USA, answering what the biggest risk she took in her life was: “…when I went to Canada and went snowboarding. It’s not like the mountains of North Carolina at all; it’s hard work. It was definitely a big risk for me. That was very hard, definitely… a risk.” Miss South Carolina, when asked why one-fifth of Americans can’t locate the U.S. on a map: “I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because …. uhh, some … people out there in our nation don’t have maps, and… uhh, I believe that our education, like, such as in South Africa and the Iraq everywhere like, such as, and… Our education in the U.S. should help the U.S. or should help South Africa and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries so we will be able to build up our future for our children.”
41:39 – After 13 years and 200 computers working on the problem—including a break from 1996-2001 because the most powerful computers at the time weren’t up to the task—researchers have solved the game of checkers. The result – a perfect game cannot be won or lost, but will inevitably end in a draw. Even the most skilled player can’t execute a cunning move designed to win; he can only avoid making a mistake that leads to a loss. Computers examined more than 500 billion different possible board combinations
2:07 – Jonathan’s random diversion about the Koosh Ball leaves Seth mindfucked
2:26 – Depth charge ringtone goes off
8:58 – New fried foods at Texas State Fair (fried cookie dough, fried guacamole, deep-fried latte)
59:51 – Seth explains PodcastAlley to listeners like it’s a new revelation
1:02:27 – Seth’s computer is really old; he’ll go to websites and nothing will load
19:35 – Seth’s reaction to Owen attempting suicide: “If I saw my fucking lady rolling around with Dax Shepard, I’d fucking kill myself too. It’s like Jennifer Aniston leaving Vince Vaughn for Dane Cook. Give me a rope because this is disgusting.”
49:21 – Seth rips his mom for only giving him 50 cents per tooth when he lost one
55:27 – Seth and Jonathan hammer Kenny Chesney
5:15 – Seth addresses Jeff, his adopted black grandson