View Episode 027
Originally aired 08.14.06
1:00:43
6:48 – UYD: Cum on a Bible
24:58 – UYD: Knowledge and bombs
25:19 – UYD: Good morning Hezbollah
27:04 – UYD: No queer dolphins
37:35 – UYD: Cumming on Florida
39:15 – UYD: To be latered
48:07 – UYD: Just gallivanting
59:13 – UYD: It’s called a knuckle rub
37:38 – Tuesday night, Aug. 15, 2 hours, NBC, Miss Teen USA 2006; next Sunday night, Aug. 20, 8 to 10 p.m. on FOX, 2006 Teen Choice Awards; at 10 p.m., switch over to Comedy Central for the 90-minute roast of William Shatner.
3:25 – Sexsomnia: Seth can’t help but perform sexual acts while falling deep into REM sleep
26:15– (trumpet intro) – man riding jet ski gets knocked off by huge fish (Seth: “The fish hate being there and take it out on the people living there”); girl charged for trying to kill her family by making them peanut butter cup dessert with a 40-oz container of Spic and Span poured in it; fake officer takes victims into custody and robs them; man run over by three separate vehicles; (Seth: “Pedestrian, walking down the street. Pickup truck, boom! Hits him, knocks him, spins him around, he falls down. Here comes a Cutlass, doo-doof! Rolls over him. Ahh! Kind of spins him a little bit more, he’s screaming, nobody helping. What is this? Vrooooom. That’s a semi. DOO-DOOF! All three. Can’t find him. No witnesses. That’s how it goes.” - 35:42); etc.
24:14 – YoTank military grade DAP cases (bullet-proof iPod case so you can listen to Koby Teeth on the battlefront)
45:57 – Daz feat. Rick Ross – “On Some Real Shit”
48:11 – Dierks Bentley – “What Was I Thinkin’”
20:09 – While at Hollywood Park watching the horse races, Seth sees Channing Tatum and Justin Long slapping each other, laughing, throwing tickets in the air
Games That Jonathan and Seth Play
52:57 – Jah has to create a poem using the words “Asafa Powell.”
50:02 – Title not mentioned:
Now it is time for the beginning of the end / Now it is time for the highest to send / A messenger of the way it should and could be / I put no limit on the power within / The unity of all is one / But as strong as strong can be / It has been grasped and mangled and spit back out for all to see / You wont be seeing me preaching on the TV / About how to sell out and act a fool / But you may be seeing me on your TV
2:06 – Jah is on his way back from Hollywood on Houser, gets to a stoplight and sees a “rear-view mirror cute” chick behind her. She’s holding on to the steering wheel wearing wool Rocky gloves, starts talking to herself going crazy. She rolls down the glove and starts shaving her wrists with a Bic razor. Jah thinks it might be Morgellan’s.
22:02 – Seth’s friend John Buckley, working around the corner from the Santa Monica Farmer’s Market in 2003, hears carnage and destruction and runs outside with the guy he works with to see a triage unit after that old fool George Weller plowed through and killed 10 people and injured 63 others
7:20 – U.S. Army having trouble recruiting people; raises the maximum enlistment age from 40 to 42 in the first week of June ’06. Five dudes have signed up since.
52:44 – Jamaican sprinter Asafa Powell can’t get on a plane because of custom shoes
54:30 – Long time listener, first time killer Wayne Adam Ford enters police station with tit in pocket (first mentioned in Ep. 23 @ 16:52) … Victoria Redstall falls in love with him. Now Jah’s falling in love with her.
13:04 – Jonathan talks about Costco’s lifetime full return policy – Amir bought a $350 tube TV three years ago, walked in this week and they gave him $350 cash
33:59 – Seth talks about his 7-year-old daughter, Vanessa
42:54 – Ten years ago there were 2 million pay phones; now there are 1 million
38:09 – Who will win Miss Teen USA? Jonathan: Nebraska. Seth: South Carolina
58:50 – Jah will give you a handjob and Seth will blow you if you can procure them a copy of “Hover Me.”
19:12 – Seth and Jah hammer Bruce “Bruno” Willis for having a personal scrapbooker and referring to himself as “Bruno” when he blows harp
20:34 – Seth makes fun of Farmers Market in Santa Monica for having valet parking for bicycles on Sundays
52:51 – J: “Is he African-American or Jamaican?” S: “Fast be he run! Unite!”